Slightly off center

So, something's a little wacky these days. I mean, normally, I'm grounded, both feet planted firmly on the terra firma. The old head above water, dealing with the various stresses that are handed to me on a daily basis by everything in my life.

But, things have been going a little wonky for the past month or so.

By the end of the week at my full time gig, I find that I am really out of sorts. Sort of standing with my head tilted to one side, going "WTF??". Asking myself where exactly it was, at what point do I think I may have gone a little sideways.

It's really very weird.

And then the weekend comes and everything seems to right itself and all is once again well with the world. I have time to be at home with the boys and SG (as trying as the buggers can be!) Time doing the never ending stuff that needs to be done around here. I get back to normal.

And today, after having not one, but TWO! freaking bombs dropped on me at the office, I think I figured out just what is wrong.

Here, take a look.


That is the view from my desk.

No wonder my world seems to be somewhat lopsided and slightly off center come Friday. I spend 8 1/2 hours looking out at this!

I'm calling the developer tomorrow.

This tree is seriously screwing with my life.

I'm getting better, I didn't scream

As is the usual every morning, I head out to let the pups out, feed them, fresh water, you know, just general taking care of these little things so that they will survive and grow to be big beautiful dogs. This morning, no different. Grass very dew-y, chair very damp (you'd think I'd have the brains to bring a towel out with me and wipe the seat off wouldn't you?), cup of tea and morning smoke, very enjoyable. I could see that it's going to be a hot one today. And feel it. The humidity, coupled with the chinooks, is killing me.

Anyway, I did the morning routine. Chased the hounds around the yard trying to keep them out of trouble, kept an eye on Boy Dog who's nose is really out of joint with all the attention the puppies are getting and he seems to think it might be nice to live somewhere else so attempts to sneak off, tried to keep Girl Dog from chewing the faces off the puppies. I tell you, she takes discipline to a whole new level in the morning. Not a morning dog I'm guessing. Anyway, where was I going with this...

Yes. I'm not sure if any of you heard the story earlier this week (or was it last week) about the woman who found a baby bat in her bra. She was at work and felt this "fluttering" in her bra and went to the washroom to see what was going on and after removing the bra, out came a baby bat. I was wondering what size of bra this woman had that she was able to house a baby bat in there. Turns out it was a pretty big bra. Anyway...

So this morning, I'm back in the house, making another cup of tea and getting ready to head down to my office to try and come up with something for a blog. Take some pictures off the camera and reload my MP3 player. Clean up the hard drive and pray that #2 hasn't brought in a bunch of crap that will render yet another re-format. I mean, what else do you do at seven in the morning on a Sunday when you're the only one up and everyone else is still sound asleep.

And then I felt something. In the sleeve of my hoodie. It was a fluttering.

Now, I wasn't too overly concerned as I'd felt this feeling before. Lack of milk or cheese tends to make my muscles do a little flutter thing every now and again. So I ignored it. And then it happened again. I thought "what the hell?" It stopped. And I resumed pouring my cup of tea.

And then again!

Okay, so this is SERIOUS! Off comes the hoodie, in a rather dramatic fashion if I do say so myself. I literally ripped the hoodie off, tearing it in the process. You have to understand, I just knew there was something in there and if I didn't get the hoodie off quickly, whatever it was would have time to chew my left arm off and then probably head to other parts of my body and who knows what would've happened then! I could quite possibly be consumed in entirety by whatever was in the sleeve of my hoodie. I mean, there's still frickin wood ticks out there so I'm a little on edge.

With the hoodie now tossed against the kitchen cabinets I stood back and evaluated the situation. It wasn't moving, which was a good thing. I could see that it wasn't on me, which was an even better thing! I slowly went up to the hoodie, and using a spatula, gave it a little nudge. And then another one. And then, out it came.

One of the biggest frickin moths I have EVER seen in my life!

AND IT WAS IN THE SLEEVE OF MY HOODIE!!!

And...now its flying around upstairs in my house. And I'm locked in my office. Waiting for someone to wake up and remove the arm eating moth from the residence.

Maybe I should've screamed.

Friday Random Roundup

Changed the title. I can, it’s my blog. Besides, I thought it would be a better description.

BLACKOUT
Have you ever had so much to dri….wait, no, Jodie not that…. I need someone to explain to me how the decision is made to blackout the televising of home football games. Two weeks ago, it was blacked out and we couldn’t see it. And last night, we could. What’s up with that?

NEW CRUSH
Well well well!! Isn’t that Ryan Dinwiddie just a cutey patuty?? And he can throw a football pretty good too! Very exciting game last night and if I was Glenn, I’d be a wee bit concerned. I wonder if Bryant’s butt is sore today?

HUMIDITY
And hair. Don’t even bother attempting a hairdo! Who knew that I was in possession of “wavy” hair when the humidity reaches 94% And, not all of it’s wavy either, just one side…and just some it….sheesh.

GARDEN
Why is it that the weeds grow so fast and the corn isn’t even knee high yet? I’m beginning to think it won’t amount to much. We needed the heat earlier and now, apparently, its here and it might be too late for the corn.

KIDS
Well, one anyway. I miss mine. #1 has been working every night. And while I appreciate the quiet that is bestowed upon the house while he is away, I miss him. Besides, I need him to cut the grass!

KATY PERRY
And that damn song of hers! It just keeps running through my head. And quite frankly, to be caught singing it out loud could be quite embarrassing…considering I can’t sing…let alone singing the words…

WORK
Soooo….I get a new boss 01/01/09. That’s all I’m saying….that’s it, that’s all.

Happy Weekend

Double Shot, I know

A conversation.
While driving.

#2: This is Alicia Keys

Me: Yes, it is. She's outstanding.

#2: She's known for two things, did you know that?

Me: Yes I did

#2: One of them is her bass. Heavy bass in everything she does. Did you know that?

Me: Yes, I did.

#2: What else?

Me: She's a great piano player

#2: It's called a pianist

Me: She's not a penis!

#2: MOM!!!...I said PEE-A-NIST...

Me: Guess I should get my hearing checked

#2: No, just figure out how to hear

A picture with a story

Someone should have told me that prior to golfing for the first time in forever that there should be some stretching involved. Even if it was just stretching across the table to get your beer, some stretching should be done.

No one did.

My girlfriend and I, along with our extremely patient and understanding instructor, hit the driving range on Sunday. A couple of buckets of balls, some putt-ing time and a round of miniature golf later, my word we were awesome! Well, we think we were. Particularly after a number of frozen drinks at the après’ golf (I know its après’ ski, can it be après’ golf too?) back at my house.

I’m so going to be all over the place with this, but bear with me, I’m hoping it’ll be giggle worthy.

I picked up the Magic Bullet at Costco on Friday. And some fresh strawberries. And some limes. This is the ticket to good Margarita’s; fresh fruit and the Magic Bullet! I was somewhat taken aback when, heading back to the Cav, a twenty something year old guy, an employee collecting carts, looked at me and said “Margarita’s?” and I said “Yes” and with a big smile he said “Where? I’ll bring the Tequila”. Sheesh, I’m old enough to be your mother…anyway, off topic… SG had the Tequila and I was picking up the Vodka. We were doing “après golf” on Sunday!

And, while the aches and pains had started to set in, and I’m quite certain they would’ve been much worse if there hadn’t been a couple of frozen drinks to ease the pain (they do say, use ice when something hurts - we did), I came around to the front of the house to see one of most incredible sights I have ever seen. It was a vehicle. And a very nice vehicle at that!!

And I knew there was no way in hell that I would be able to take it for a drive, but I just wanted to sit in it. And maybe after that be taken for a ride in it.

It was unbelievable. You ever get that nervous feeling in your stomach and then it goes away and your knees get weak and you sort of start to shake? Similar to the on-set of flu-like symptoms, but you know this is going to be sooo much better. Yeah, that was the feeling as I slid in behind the wheel of this vehicle. Absolute pure luxury. And the same feeling, as we took the curve in the highway at 110 kms. It was awesome!

And I had to get a picture of me sitting is this lap of luxury. And I’d thought I’d share.

Personally, I think it suits me.

I just need someone to buy it for me.

I need a case of this please!!

Chestnut Brown by, well, what does it matter. It does the job! and I'm going to be buying it by the caseload! That’s the colour of choice when the naturally occurring "silver" highlights appear and start to take over. No, they're not grey, they're silver!! Naturally occurring I suppose, but brought on by, well, age maybe, but I prefer to think that it’s all the testosterone I have to deal with in this house.

First it was the motorcycle. A beat up old thing that had been placed in the back on the side of the pasture and left there to rot. #1 brought it up to the house and took it apart and rebuilt it and got it running. Nothing like walking in from work to see a carburetor sitting on one of the new bath towels in the middle of your coffee table. I look on this positively however, as, well, at least he covered the coffee table….Once he got it running, well, hell be damned, “I’m going to ride it!” Excuse me? You’re not even 14 yet, YOU. ARE. NOT!!! The lecture went on a little bit, with some colourful language tossed in for good measure and to stress a few points. You know, like, oh say possible death. Road rash. Broken neck. It appears I lost that battle when I pulled in the driveway one day from work and there he was, coming up from the back, ON THE FRICKIN’ MOTORCYCLE!

And then came the snowmobile. Another fast moving motorized thing that had been sitting back there, just a little further down from the motorcycle. And, of course, as is the normal in this house, more repair work was required. This time though, it was the dining table that was used for all things mechanical! Which is better than the coffee table. The dining table, well it’s one of my little projects that one day I’ll get to. I want to re-finish it and make it all nice and pretty again. Stain it the same colour as the coffee table, paint the legs, you know, make it all match and look nicey nice.

Off topic…whoops.

So there’s been talk around this house of a dirt bike being purchased. And I’ll tell you right now, I took no part in this conversation. I avoided getting trapped into looking at the ad by whatever means possible. “You can’t go on the internet, I’m going on.” “I’ve changed the user password and I’m not logging you in.” “I discontinued the internet and now we have no internet”. Whatever it took. I did not want this to happen. The motorcycle brought some scars. The snowmobile brought some scars. I just couldn’t imagine what a dirt bike would bring.

So leave it to #1 to get all creative and stuff. He purposely didn’t cash his paycheques so he would save the money. We don’t have a truck so he made the arrangements with our neighbour to get a ride out to where this dirt bike is. I did my best today to distract him from this. Took him into the local town, did some shopping, went here, went there, you know, basically tried to waste away the time until he had to go to work.. And then my cell rang. And people were coming to see the pups so home we had to go…Shit.

Not home for 15 minutes and I hear “see ya in a bit”. Turn around to see the neighbours truck in the driveway and #1 getting in. Off they went. To return 3 ½ hours later. With this.


Great. Just frickin' LOVELY!!!!!


And while you can't really see it because I blurred the faces of my children, (so as not to exploit them on the internet...you know....I am their mother!! ) there is such a look of envy on #2's face that it nearly broke my heart. I'm thinking I will not survive this.

I really won't.

EDIT: Nice hair cuts eh? Did them myself...We got a #2 on #1 and and #4 on #2...SG didn't buy in however, so I can't call myself a barber....yet.

Friday Fun Facts #2

I like doing this random thing! It clears the clutter from my head....

WHERE THE LIGHT IS
It was actually requested by one of my co-workers that I go out and get the CD's from my car and put them in the player at the office. Hard core rocker dude (probably the biggest KISS fan ever!!) likes my boy Johnny...

ICED CAPPUCCINOS
Made with cream, outstanding! Don't even BOTHER with the milk or chocolate milk! However, it is suggested that it not be the only food product consumed all day when you have intentions of drinking copious amounts of grape later that evening... Yeah, you really should eat some actual food before you do that.

BASEBALL
Something just isn't right when you overhear someone explaining to someone else all about the "bases" (as in 1st, 2nd, and so on with the "relationship" bases...) Especially if this conversation is between is a couple of people you work with. I'm feeling a little too old for this...

LANDSCAPERS
Particularly the ones right outside my office, well, they have really strong arms and backs. I can see that by the way they move the mud around with the shovels and toss the sod back and forth. Makes the day go by far too quickly!

CONSTRUCTION
Did you know that there is not one single route through the city that I can take to get my butt home that isn't littered with construction of some type? And no construction on the way in. It's sort of like, "oh yeah, we'll get you there in a flash, but as far as going home quickly? nope, just not going to happen". Construction workers are just like landscapers, by the way. So it's really okay. I don't mind.

WORK
This morning it was discovered that I am now the senior person at work. I don't mean oldest, I mean been working for my boss the longest. The former senior person (and by only 3 months) has resigned. Not to sure if this is a good thing or not.... And this afternoon, another bomb was dropped....I think I better hang on to my seat 'cause this ride just might get a little bumpy.

FORE!!!!
Yes, you read correctly. One of my girlfriend's and I are learning how to golf this weekend. No doubt we'll be pro's come Sunday afternoon! SG's nephew will be instructing us in the art of holding a club and hitting a little white ball as far and as straight as we possibly can (I'm guessing that's what you're suppose to try and do....).

And, after this day, not to mention this week!....I think I might just enjoy a little bit of something with more impact than the grape tonight!

Happy Weekend!

It was bound to happen

It appears that we, SG and I, are at that crossroad in life. You know the one, where your children start to get a life (only because you're letting them I might add!!) and you're left to figure out yours.

Yeah, kinda depressing, given the conversation that went on here tonight.

#2 has gone to his buddy's cabin. Poor buddy's mom...she's taken three of them, including her own. Three 12 Year Olds!!! She needs her head read, seriously....At least she had the common sense to leave her oldest at home! And #2 won't be back until Saturday.

#1 is working the close shift all this week. Well, he has today off and he's hanging out with my future daughter in law. She just doesn't know it yet. Nor does he! He thinks he's got someone else in mind, but I know better!

So here we are, left on our own. And the conversation went something like this.

SG: So....

Me: So....

SG: What ya wanna do?

Me: I don't know, what you wanna do?

SG: Well, the neighbour needs my help putting up some drywall....

Me: I really should post a blog...

SG: OK

Me: OK

I guess now's the time that we start to figure out if we really like each other or not.

The Birch Tree Won

So, picture this.

Seriously, picture this...just how redneck can one get, honestly!

I was able to drive the lawn tractor today. They let me!! And yes, I know, with the word "tractor" you may be thinking a big green John Deere with super wide cutting deck, but no, it's a little Rally, 36" cutting deck that will sometimes cut good and sometimes cut, well, not so good.

It's always the males in this house that think they need to take care of the grass cutting. But the grass was long and there was a ton of trimming to do and be DAMNED if I was going to use the weed whacker!! I'll help out by driving the tractor, thank you very much!

So, there I was, perched upon the seat and driving this thing around the yard, cutting grass. I had been instructed to start at the back and then, once I got closer to the trees and stuff, SG would take over and I could go and have a nap or do dishes or something inside the house. "Just don't go near the trees!!!"

With a wee bit of a competitive streak and being one who doesn't usually listen and one who thinks that they can do it all and do it better! I decided that I would just carry on. I mean after all, SG was still doing the trimming and I was done doing the open space cutting. I could handle negotiating my way around a few trees, surely I could.

I headed off toward the trees. And there I was, with a "beverage" in one hand, a smoke in the other, sporting a baseball cap, cutting near the trees. And getting closer and closer.

It was when I needed to negotiate around the birch tree that things got a little tricky. This is the same birch tree that SG and I planted 17 years ago when we first moved out here. This poor tree, it has seen better days. It's dead at the top but the bottom is still flourishing.

I thought that I could get down low enough in the seat to miss the branch. I thought that I could get close enough so that no trimming would be required.

And....I thought wrong.

And now, I'm sporting a nasty little gash on my forehead. Well, not really a gash. More of a scrape. Well, maybe not a scrape, maybe a scratch....All I know is that it knocked my sunglasses and baseball cap off, I dropped my smoke and my "beverage" landed in my lap.

I'm thinking that perhaps "Domestic Goddess" is more my forte...

Oh great, there goes the neighbourhood

Imagine if you will, your parents bought land. Lots of land. And they worked this land and made this land the site of their homestead. And then, they had you and your brothers and sisters and raised you all on this land. They farmed the land and turned it into some of the most beautiful pasture you could ever imagine, just so they could sustain their main interest, which was horses. They built barns, put up corrals, cut and baled hay. A beautiful place to live and to raise children. And horses. A quiet place, out in the country with nothing but fresh air and starry skies.

Then, your parents give you some of the land so you too could build a home and raise your family. And you build your home and raise your children on the land right next door to your Mom and Dad. You build barns and corrals and carry on with the family tradition of raising horses.

But, as we all know, parents get older. Your Mom takes ill and needs extended care in a facility in the city, and your Dad, well, the house is too big for just him. But you love the fact that your Dad is still next door to you, on the land he spent his whole life working and nurturing. But it is too much for him. You help out as much as you can, and so do the neighbours. Everyone is watching out, just to make sure everything is okay and everything gets done.

Then your Dad passes away.

Here you are, left with the home you grew up in. The home your Mom and Dad built and raised you in. What do you do now? None of your brothers or sisters want it. You check to see if perhaps one of your children want it. None do. So you sit on it. Sit on it for a very long time. And then you decide to put it up for sale. A private sale. This way you can really get to know the people that may buy it. You need to know that everything about the people moving in is good and wonderful and that they’ll fit in living 30 feet away from you.

And you find a wonderful family. A mom and a dad, two beautiful children. Oh yes, the quiet life in the country is just what they’re looking for. Raise the children outside of the city where they can keep an eye on them. Maybe even use the barns and start up a hobby farm type thing. Perfect you think. The deal is sealed!

Deception. Easy for some people I guess.

Last night brought four solid hours of noise generated by six quads. Yes, the new neighbours moved in. And they tore up that back pasture like you have no idea. They spooked the horses. They spooked the dogs. They pissed everyone within ear shot right off. They tore up and down the road and then they tore up the pasture some more!

We had an opportunity to talk to #1Son’s friend last night who is the granddaughter of the man who lives next door. The same man that was faced with the daunting task of finding someone to move into his Dad’s house. And Grandpa is just devastated.

And her Dad, (because he’s just on the other side of Grandpa on the land that was bought a long time ago!) well, we’re kinda thinking we might have to go visit him in jail soon…Because once he gets over there, well, we’re just not sure what might happen. And the neighbour on the other side; he drives a Harley and has some pretty rough looking biker buddies. Him and his buddies may just be the ones to save the day…and the neighbourhood!

And as for Great Grandpa, the man who built the house and managed the land, I hope he’s busy up there ridin’ and ropin’ and doesn’t have a clue as to what is going on down here.

Please, God, let that be the case.

Friday Fun Facts

A whole lot of randomness, but here we go...

THE WORKOUT ROUTINE
It's going good. Really good. As SG refers to it, "So, you're off to see Jim are you? How is Jim? Is Jim good?" He seems to be having a hard time with my dedication to the working out routine I enjoy so much. He is, however, enjoying the results! I took my measurements back in April. April 4th to be exact. And then I took my measurements on July 8th. Yeah baby!! Oh Yeah!! We are talking a serious loss of inches!! I'm not telling how much just yet, but suffice it to say that last year's summer wardrobe, well, it needs to go to a tailor!

THE PUPPY FRONT
OMG, they are so cute! I want to keep them all. I've decided that we should keep the Tiger Lilly in order to keep up with the breeding. But then again, there is NC, not to mention Blue (aka Plume)...wait, let's just find good homes for them all, never mind thinking about keeping them!

THE SLEEP DEPRIVATION
Not exactly sure how this one will resolve itself. All I know is that with all these hours #1Son is getting, my little bit of a tax deduction that I used to get is not gonna happen this year. Crap.

12 YEAR OLDS
I really don't remember the first 12 year old being this tricky. #2Son has some tricks up his sleeve, my oh my....Unfortunately, I need some sleep in order to be able to on top of my game where he is concerned!

WORK
And while I don't like to talk about my full time gig on here, let it be known that there is something going on. And it's going to be something big. I mean seriously, the bankers came by. And yes, I said "bankers". Not just one, but three of the buggers. It's my hope that I'll know more next week.

RADIO BITS
I hate the sound of my voice when I hear it back. And I got to hear it back in full force yesterday. It would appear that my DJ friend likes to take our conversations and play them back on the radio....we have a mutual admiration of, well, just check back a couple of posts! She says my voice sounds good, me, well, I don't think so.

GARDEN
It's weeded. It's growing. It's time to start making salads. Lots and lots of salads. And it would appear that green beans are not too far off in our future.

And while I know there is a ton more randomness (I usually think about when I'm driving), it's now turned into Saturday...no more Friday Fun Facts!

Sleep, how I crave you....

It's been rough here. I am talking a serious lack of sleep. Real serious.

And it has nothing to do with wood ticks I might add.

#1 has been working the 4 - 12 shift. Which means, he gets his butt in the house sometime between 12:30 and, oh, well, whenever. Which, in turn means, the dogs go off. Yes, the two big dogs bark their asses off in fear that someone, anyone! may be compromising the homestead. I do consider myself fortunate that he's getting a ride home from the kitchen, but seriously, these cars need to get rid of their noisy-ness (is that spelled right?).

And then, whomever has driven him home (there's only 2 people he closes with) are absolutely in love with the pups, so along with the ride comes the obligatory "I want to see the pups" routine, which manages to disrupt the house (or at least my sleep) for at least another 1/2 hour. And, after they leave, there's the mandatory "gotta have a swim"...frick!

And while I do appreciate the dark of the night wake-up to make sure my 1st born is home, safe and sound, I absolutely need to get some sleep. It doesn't matter if I'm in bed at 8:30 or 10:30 or whenever. Getting woken up anytime after midnight manages to screw me up royally. It wakes me up. I get up. I look out at the sky to see the moon waxing (or waning, or full, whatever!), I check out all the fireflies that I thought would no longer exist do to all the pesticiding. Hell, I even go out and have the occassional smoke.

But last night, well it kinda killed me. And it wasn't even #1's fault. He was home at 9:30. We had a lovely little bonding session. "So, how's it going? I've missed you. Why didn't you do your chores today? That's no excuse, you need to take responsiblity." You know, the basic parent lecturing gig that all of us go through. And if you're not, you will be.

Here's where the killing me part comes into play, just in case you were wondering.

The coyotes woke me up. There I was, knowing that all was safe and sound and everybody was where they were and accounted for. I could sleep. No late night wakings. Just sweet and dreamful sleep. Until about 1:02 am. I know this. Because I looked at the clock. And then I said "F*#k! Yes, I did. I said a bad word. Out loud.

There was nothing out there that the eye could see. But yet, I was awake! And then I heard them. Coyotes. Barking and yipping and screaming! And there I found myself worrying about the pups! They're outside, in a kennel, in a locked building, in a locked kennel. And all I could hear was coyotes! STALKING MY LITTER. I just KNEW it!!!

Rumour has it that they send a couple out to see what is going on with wherever...and then the rest of the bastards come in for the attack. And, while this may be just rumour, I was taking it to heart. And I couldn't sleep.

And this went on until 3:50. Who knows, it may have gone on longer. I passed out from sheer exhaustion. But you have to know who didn't get a whole lot of sleep?...

Seriously, I am tired.

So, check this out

Just because I got nothing else right now!

We've got 2 males and 3 females left to go...I'm gonna miss them!

This is Blackie

Here we have Helorb, Blue, and Tiger Lilly, and no, they're not dead, they're sleeping!

Lime has found a home with two of the sweetest little girls I've ever met!

Here's NC (no collar), such a pretty little one, we may just keep her!

And another one of Tiger Lilly, she's such a cutie we may just keep her too!

Where The Light Is

I don’t do music reviews on this blog. As a matter of fact, I don’t think I’ve ever done one. But, as many of you know, I love music. L.O.V.E. it!!! Music just hits right through to the soul for me. I’m not sure why, it just does. Perhaps it’s the frustration thing that I’ve got going on with not being musically inclined whatsoever, but I’m thinking it might just be the words and the way they’re put to the music. I don’t know. But I do know that I don’t like to push what hits home for me on to others. It’s an individual kind of thing.

But…here we go.

For the last little while, well, since Mother’s Day, Alicia Keys has been in the CD player, both here and in the car. Her new CD, As I Am, is truly an awesome thing. It’s like she took a look at my life (and all the other women my age!!) and managed to find the diaries of all us and put what she read in those diaries to music and make it a truly outstanding thing! It has had such an impact on me that I cannot even begin to explain.

But sorry Alicia, it’s time to get the hell out of Dodge! (Or in my case, the Cav!)

I picked up the new John Mayer CD today. And yes, I also picked up the DVD. It’s called “Where The Light Is, John Mayer, Live in Los Angeles”. You see, John did a show at the Nokia in LA late last year (actually two of them) and it was him playing acoustic, and then the John Mayer Trio and then John with his full band. And they recorded it. And now they’ve released it.

And it is some kind of KICK ASS CD!!!!

If you’re not a John Mayer fan and all you know of him is the pop that’s been played on the radio, and think you might want be a little adventurous, I suggest you head on out and get this CD. At least the CD. Because once you get the CD, you’re gonna want to go out and get the DVD. To see this man play is, well, words cannot describe it. He is outstanding! Wait, what am I talking about, I haven’t seen this DVD yet....But I have seen him live and in person and in far too many YouTube videos...isn't that what lunch hours are for? And his Any Given Thursday DVD is unlike no other.

So, I put the first disc in and was listening while I was making dinner tonight. After the second track I sooo wanted to put the DVD in. But, I made this incredibly stupid promise to myself that I would wait. Listen to the CD first and then put the DVD in. The acoustic portion is wonderful. The Trio portion is wonderful. The full band is wonderful! It’s all sunshine and rainbows people, just go out and buy it.

And, just so you know, because I know you want to, I’ll be watching the DVD tonight. Me, all by myself, with the big screen and the surround sound. SG knows not to interrupt me and John! Besides, there’s four other TV’s in this house and they can pick and choose amongst themselves.

Where The Light Is, John Mayer, Live in Los Angeles….hurry, go out and get it.

Nothing wrong with Rainbows

So, just in case you weren’t aware (like that’s even possible!), we have puppies. Yes, eight of the little buggers. They’re 7 weeks old on Sunday. And they’re ready to go. And seriously, judging from the condition of my ankles and my flip flops, they NEED!!! to go…Just kidding.

But anyway, last weekend we did their shots and tattoos and, hell, I even gave them a pedicure. Yes, I’m nice like that.

And with the tattooing, came the “putting on of the collars”. When I went and bought the collars, the selection at the local Dollarama (insert trademark here) was so good that I got eight different colored/patterned collars. And this made the tattoo process that much easier. You see, apparently indelible ink is somewhat immune to puppy spit and the tattoo numbers written on the collars manages to disappear, within days! So, by colour coding them, it worked out really well. Because everyone knows that you can’t see the tattoos until, like, forever. Or, well, at least for 6 – 8 months.

Originally, we had eight collars, but one of them went somewhere. We’re not sure where. And no one knows either, go figure. So, one of them is currently collar-less, which doesn’t seem fair because one of the pups is now sporting two collars. Yes, someone loved this puppy enough to decide they wanted to take it home. But not quite yet. No, not for another week. But that’s okay.

And now, with these collars, we are really able to tell who is who and are in a position to tell prospective buyers just what type of personality each pup has. And we have nicknames for all of them. Limey, Blue Boy, Forrest (no, not as in Gump, but as in the green color!), Blackie, and well, on it goes.

However, I will admit, right here and right now, I messed up. The two patterned collars I picked up, one of a rainbow type coloring and the other of a tiger stripe colouring, well, they were inadvertently put on the wrong pups. The rainbow collar was put on the male and the tiger collar was put on the female.

We were referring to the pup as with the tiger coloured collar, as well, Tiger. But only for a day. She’s now called Tiger Lily and well, the rainbow collared pup is called Helorb. Yes, that’s correct. Helorb. It’s a short form of HEterosexual Lover Of RainBows. My idea. And quite possibly, not such a good one, seeing as I’m the only one calling him that. The others are calling him Rainbow pup.

I like Helorb better.

You can always count on your kids

To give you fuel!

After being tapped out where creativity comes into play in the writing of this blog, I awoke this morning to a kick start of sorts.

I must preface this by saying, that, while I love birds, I do have some issues where birds are concerned. I can sit out on my deck and watch them come to the feeders and be completely enthralled for hours. And in the winter, when they're getting drunk on the left over berries on the trees, I'm seriously entertained.

However, way back when, when SG and I first got back together, we went to his cousin’s house. It was my first time meeting them so I was a wee bit nervous but you know, still composed. “Hello, how are you? Nice to meet you. Sure I’ll have a pop. Rather have a beer, but, okay.”

And then they let the birds out.

And it was at this time that I discovered that birds, doesn’t matter what kind of birds, flying around in a house, will freak me right the hell out. Right to the point where I cower down in my seat and cover my head and start to hyper-ventilate. Yes, it really is that bad.

And when I awoke this morning and was stumbling my way down the hall in that half asleep state that we are all in when the alarm rudely wakes us from the lovely and wonderful dreamland we’ve spent the last few hours in, I saw a light coming from the kitchen. I stopped at the end of the hallway and thought to myself, “What the hell is that?”



And, upon closer inspection, I came across this.



A note.

And I immediately thought, “Oh Shit, THERE'S BIRDS IN MY HOUSE!!!!!!”.

And here was my 15 year old kid telling me to take the birds back to their nest, and at first light yet!

This would mean that I would have to pick up the bowl and actually carry it and walk with it, back outside, and put the birds back where they belong. Birds, in a bowl, in my hand!!! COMING FROM MY HOUSE!!!!!

Talk about ripped from the lovely land of dreams!! Time to face your fears chicky!!

However, there is a happy ending to the story. I didn't freak out and drop the baby birds. And the mother, who was anxiously screaming for the little ones, hopped right back on the nest and is still keeping them warm as I write this.

And this has proven that, three birds in a bowl (and as such "in your hand", interpretation is everything!) is far better than having the little buggers flying around in your house!

Statistical Summary

Well, things have been interesting around here according to the statistics. Well, not really, but I was easily amused doing an analysis of my stat sight.

Had over 1500 hits in June. That's nice, glad everyone is enjoying it.

42% spent more than an hour on it in one visit. Guess there must be something interesting in here.

26% were first time visitors. That's the highest it's been. A lot of them from over in the UK, Ireland (that must be my friend Carol's doing, handing out my blog address to your family - shame on you!!) Japan and Africa (I'm not sure why....)

Top Google search phrase (this is kinda weird, but makes sense I guess)

1. Bear Baiting (mostly from overseas (Australia and New Zealand to be specific, must be hunting season over there, some of them came back too!)
2. Blueberry Pie Recipe
3. Woodticks burrowing in nose (this one had 13 hits! so apparently I'm not the only one paranoid about this)
4. Big Mac Pocket (I don't know...)
5. Josh The Trainer
6. Perogies without onions
7. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Chest Tightening (huh?)
8. Take a trip and never leave the farm

I will say, however, that the use of what they call "key words or phrases" does work. I had more hits on my last post than I've ever had on any one post at all! They were looking for, and I'm serious here, Tequila, Joe Nichol, country song, get naked (how that comes into play is beyond me!), falling off, and, check this out, "how to use a shot glass".

I've tried to replicate some of these searches by doing a google search for the same, but alas, nothing came up. Unless it was waaayy down on the list. And if that's the case, some people do need to get a life!

So, that's your first, and probably last, statistical update. For me, it was kind of interesting. For you, meh, probably not so much.

Can you tell my brain is wasting away and isn't very creative these days? But I thought this would be better than posting the pictures of the Canada Day Fireworks. I know I said last year that I would get better, and I did, but not that much better. Not better enough to post some of them. I've decided I'm going to have to save my pennies and purchase that little gem of a Canon that I've always wanted.

Then you'll get some pictures!

Here's hoping for more entertaining babbling soon....

Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off

What a great song. It's by Joe Nichols. It's country. And, it may, or may not be true ~ snicker snicker...

The weekend thus far, can be summed up in pictures. I know, I know, you all wish that I would write more and say stuff and stuff, but hey, I'm on a four day vacation. A vacation that would've been so much better had the office not been so thoughtful and taken the time to call me today...they best not be pulling that crap come the two week'er!

So, you start it on Saturday, with this.


And a little bit of this. Or maybe more than a little bit...


That's it, that's how you do it. Next round, we lose the shot glass...


And then, you do some of this.


Just a great night at K & M's!

And then, because you just can't get enough fun, you do a little bit of this.


Well, actually a lot of this.

And then, because you want to, you do a ton of this!






It was puppy shots and tattoo day around the House of Lint. So, now we have eight puppies, strutting themselves around, all proud and stuff, with their collars and each of them sporting a green right ear.

Tomorrow (or rather today, Happy Canada Day y'all!!) brings more of the same and the waterfront action in our local town (it's actually a city, but for me, it's still "town"). They always put on an awesome fireworks display and we've never been disappointed.

Well, unless you count that one year...