As is the usual every morning, I head out to let the pups out, feed them, fresh water, you know, just general taking care of these little things so that they will survive and grow to be big beautiful dogs. This morning, no different. Grass very dew-y, chair very damp (you'd think I'd have the brains to bring a towel out with me and wipe the seat off wouldn't you?), cup of tea and morning smoke, very enjoyable. I could see that it's going to be a hot one today. And feel it. The humidity, coupled with the chinooks, is killing me.
Anyway, I did the morning routine. Chased the hounds around the yard trying to keep them out of trouble, kept an eye on Boy Dog who's nose is really out of joint with all the attention the puppies are getting and he seems to think it might be nice to live somewhere else so attempts to sneak off, tried to keep Girl Dog from chewing the faces off the puppies. I tell you, she takes discipline to a whole new level in the morning. Not a morning dog I'm guessing. Anyway, where was I going with this...
Yes. I'm not sure if any of you heard the story earlier this week (or was it last week) about the woman who found a baby bat in her bra. She was at work and felt this "fluttering" in her bra and went to the washroom to see what was going on and after removing the bra, out came a baby bat. I was wondering what size of bra this woman had that she was able to house a baby bat in there. Turns out it was a pretty big bra. Anyway...
So this morning, I'm back in the house, making another cup of tea and getting ready to head down to my office to try and come up with something for a blog. Take some pictures off the camera and reload my MP3 player. Clean up the hard drive and pray that #2 hasn't brought in a bunch of crap that will render yet another re-format. I mean, what else do you do at seven in the morning on a Sunday when you're the only one up and everyone else is still sound asleep.
And then I felt something. In the sleeve of my hoodie. It was a fluttering.
Now, I wasn't too overly concerned as I'd felt this feeling before. Lack of milk or cheese tends to make my muscles do a little flutter thing every now and again. So I ignored it. And then it happened again. I thought "what the hell?" It stopped. And I resumed pouring my cup of tea.
And then again!
Okay, so this is SERIOUS! Off comes the hoodie, in a rather dramatic fashion if I do say so myself. I literally ripped the hoodie off, tearing it in the process. You have to understand, I just knew there was something in there and if I didn't get the hoodie off quickly, whatever it was would have time to chew my left arm off and then probably head to other parts of my body and who knows what would've happened then! I could quite possibly be consumed in entirety by whatever was in the sleeve of my hoodie. I mean, there's still frickin wood ticks out there so I'm a little on edge.
With the hoodie now tossed against the kitchen cabinets I stood back and evaluated the situation. It wasn't moving, which was a good thing. I could see that it wasn't on me, which was an even better thing! I slowly went up to the hoodie, and using a spatula, gave it a little nudge. And then another one. And then, out it came.
One of the biggest frickin moths I have EVER seen in my life!
AND IT WAS IN THE SLEEVE OF MY HOODIE!!!
And...now its flying around upstairs in my house. And I'm locked in my office. Waiting for someone to wake up and remove the arm eating moth from the residence.
Maybe I should've screamed.
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